Pre-episode Intro Desiree: The shirt that has currently been bought the most is the, "You are the twenty-seventh person to pet my dog, without," which is capitalized and underlined, "asking today." Chris: This is the Penny Forward podcast, a show about blind people building bright futures one penny at a time. I'm Chris Peterson ... Liz: I'm Liz Bottner ... MOe: I'm MOe Carpenter ... Chris: And today, we are going to talk all about self-employment, and what that takes, or what that took, rather, with Penny Forward member Desiree Christian, who recently started her own online store, and a little bit more that she'll tell us about in a second, at flauntyourability.com Go and check that out at some point during the podcast, and hear all about how it got started, from Desiree herself. Desiree, thanks for being here. Desiree: Yeah. My pleasure. Chris: Tell us about yourself, and your blindness, and, uh, a little bit about what your life has been like up until now if you would. Desiree: Um, so, I have the privilege of growing up in a blind family. My grandfather was blind, my mom is blind, I have some very excellent role models. So, the question has never been if you can do something, it's always, "Okay, so how do, how do we adapt? You can do the thing, but, but how do we make it work so you, you can do the thing?" I also have a blind daughter. So, you know, the same thing is her. "Okay, yeah, you've got a little bit more than blindness going on, but, but you can still do the thing. Let's adapt and make it happen?" So it's kind of, you know, my roots. Grandpa was a preacher, teacher, he taught braille, some of you might know him, John Bissier, he taught braille down in Albany California at their center for the blind for many years. Um, my mom had her own massage practice for a good fifteen years, and is doing her own entrepreneurial thing that is different than that, and, um, I had two daughters, and I had them pretty close together, did it when I was pretty young, so I did the whole parenting thing instead of going to college, though I tried a couple of times. And one had intractable epilepsy and she passed last year, so that would be June of 2023, but we knew it was coming. We knew it was coming for a good ten years. It wasn't unexpected. It doesn't mean was not hard, just, you know, how you end up going through grief is different, than somebody who suddenly lost, you know, their child, or loved one. And my other daughter, she's got a lot of health problems, and we're not expecting a good life outcome for her either. But, again, I learned a lot of lessons about grief having Mechala, and, we weren't intending to go this deep this fast I don't think. (Laugh.) So somebody ask me a question to get me back on track. Liz: What is your connection to the blind community? Desiree: Oh. My family. So I'm legally blind myself, but again, as I said, my grandparents, my grandpa, mom, very active involved, not just being teachers and awesome people themselves, but both NFB and ACB, and always just, you know, I, I grew up with the mentality of "teach, no matter how frustrated you are, every time you encounter a human being out in public, it's an opportunity to teach. And it could be the first time they're encountering a blind person, it could be that the previous experience wasn't a great experience." So, no matter how frustrated, no matter my inner dialog, always polite, always teaching about blindness and being independent and how to be high functioning. MOe: So tell us about Flaunt Your Ability. Desiree: I tried to start it about seven years ago, but life got really intense with Mechala, so it kind of got put on the back burner, but I kept the web site, and I'm like, "I'll eventually get back to it." And I started working with Chris, and he's like, "Well, it's super easy to get that up and going before you get these other business ideas," so we went with it, and it's up and going. And, you know, it is for people daring enough to be human, because you can say something on a T-shirt that you can't always say to someone's face. I want to eventually have all disabilities represented on there. 'cause everybody has a different ability, and it's not always a dis, a have that ability. Um, for a lot of folks it makes us stronger, makes us think about our world differently, and how we interact with it, and, not always, but generally speaking, I think makes us better people, 'cause we think about how we're treated and how we want others to see us. So, so a lot of my T-shirts are a little bit on the pointed side. 'cause it's expressing those inner feelings that we can't say out loud. So, I'm actually am currently working on a shirt, like it is ... (Laugh.) I was being bad in my, in my Hull Foundation staff meeting and working on the shirt, and then, and it says, "How To Greet a Disabled Person: Hello." I mean, you know, like, it's, it's basic, but people always freak out when they, not always, but a lot of times freak out, and they just see us as other. And the whole point is to make us seem a little bit more human. Chris: Expand, if you would, on what kinds of things made it hard for you to get Flaunt Your Ability off the ground, or, or to get a business off the ground. Desiree: Well, having two special needs children, as a blind person, who doesn't drive, countless visits to specialists. Hours and hours, uh, at the ER. Months in the hospital with one, or the other of them hospitalized. You know, constantly being a triage nurse, and a paramedic, kind of squished together but on call twenty-four seven, and, like, no brakes. Like there wasn't really anybody, one, who would step up, and two, that I felt safe to leave them with, and as Mechala got older, in particular, she had a lot of brain damage. So she could no longer self-regulate, um, so she would actually become violent. And, and you just never knew with her. Because she could be, like fine one minute, and, like a flick of the switch, and she is, it's not just somebody being angry, it's like somebody raging. And she can't control it, she knew she couldn't control it, which would then frustrate her even more. So she'd stay at uncontrollable rage, and, and just stay there for hours. Like who am I gonna get to come in and deal with that? Like, I wouldn't even ask my own family to do it. And the one time my mom did, because I went to New York to sing at Carnegie Hall with my choir, she no longer gave me a hard time about trying to discipline Mechala. She's like, "Yeah. You just ..." I'm like, "Exactly. There, there's, you can't. 'cause anything you say, anything you do, just she escalates, and escalates, and escalates. So, there was that going on, any time, any place, she could have a seizure, so, there was a time where I was being brave, trying to let her be independent, as she was cooking pancakes, and had a seizure, and I'm like, "Oh my goodness. Has she landed funny? That's the first thing, is there a screaming hot skillet on her face and we're gonna have to deal with third degree burns? I stepped into the living room, but kept my ear out, just to let her try to have some independence, and, yeah. It, it turned out okay. There was another time I was letting her, again, try to be independent, she really wanted to cook. I let her cut some vegetables. And, being a bit of a science geek, as well as super into cooking, I knew that if I gave her, like your, your, most people's instinct is, in that sort of situation, give them a small paring knife. No, no, no. If that thing falls on the ground, there's a good chance it's gonna end up in somebody's body, vs. a large chef's knife, it will land flat. Which is precisely what happened. She had the seizure, she landed on the knife, but because it was big, it landed flat. (Chuckle.) And she landed on top of it, and I'm like, "Yup. This proves my point right here." So it was this constant, all the time of just being, ... She turned 18, and we moved her into adult foster. Um, so she passed, well, from a seizure. She didn't, she didn't wake up. And out of all the things that could have possibly gone wrong, in terms of her passing, it was the least tragic way, 'cause she didn't know. She didn't get to be scared. She didn't wake up. So, you know, with her amygdala not working, and her ending up being, you know, one of the, the, the lovely cases you hear about of mentally ill person getting shot to death, she didn't have that. With her tendency to run away, she didn't get kidnapped. She didn't get murdered. She didn't get raped. She, you know, all those things. Which would have been way worse. So, her passing like that, best possible outcome. Chris: Wow. Before we move on, can you tell us a little bit about what your life has been like, what your income has been like, and uh, the sacrifices that you've had to make personally in order to, to take care of the kids? Desiree: Okay, so I, am working on getting off SSI, SSDI. I want nothing to do with it ever again. Passionately want nothing ever to do with it again. Both my girls were on SSI. So there was not a lot of money. Their father did have a job for a long time, at the Doc Martin distributing place here in Portland Oregon, so if you ever have boughten Doc Martins, up until about a year and a half ago, they would have come through Portland Oregon before you would have got them. If you bought them here in the states. So he worked in the warehouse there, and was able to give them pretty darn good health insurance for a long time, and it was stable, but still, there were a lot of months where it's, you know, robbing Peter to pay Paul. "Okay, what bill do I pay this month? How much food do we get to eat? Who's getting medications? Who's not? People are growing. You know, who gets to get clothing this month? Who doesn't? How long can I let clothing go?" Let alone trying to do any fun things. That just, you know, between not having the money to pay for the extra help and care I would need to take them out to do something fun, you know, 'cause you need extra, when you can't take regular, either fixed route or para transit. And to manage two kids with disabilities, and nobody willing to help, and in later years, I wouldn't ask anybody because of Mechala, just, like, yeah. It was, it was really hard. Pretty isolating. And then, they closed down the warehouse at Doc Martin, uh, about a year and a half ago, and all the savings that I had managed to save up, down the drain. (Chuckle.) All gone. (Laugh.) Um, you know, so, I haven't been this poor in, since the girls were little, and I have to say this time, it's easier, 'cause it's just me, and that part is nice, so it doesn't feel as stressful. So this T-shirt shop actually has, has taken off. I, I knew it was a thing that people wanted, but I, I didn't get how badly people really wanted it. Liz: In your business taking off, what has been enjoyable and exciting to you about that process? Desiree: Two things. One is the creative part, 'cause I am a creative, I can't help it, I can't shut it off, and two, watching people get so excited, elated, that they finally have something that says what they've been feeling inside, something that expresses their frustration. Something that, they're able to then express it to the world, like, so, the shirt that has currently been bought the most is the, "You are the twenty-seventh person to pet my dog, without," which is capitalized and underlined, "asking today." And everybody's elated by the shirt. Because you can sit there and tell the public, "Please don't pet my dog, don't pet my dog," and, it's like they ignore you? And they seem to think that they're the only one, and that they should be the exception to the rule. But in fact, they are the twenty-seventh person. The nineteenth person. The hundredth person. And it's so distracting when you have a guide dog, or a service dog. It's like, "Come on, People." And you can have it on signs on the harness, all kinds of things, but for whatever reason, people pay attention to the T-shirt. I don't understand why, but they do, and it's, you know, another way to have somebody express. And to, to, the joy, that people express when they get to buy the shirt, wear the shirt, you know, they're just over the moon. MOe: How has Penny Forward helped you along the way in this process of starting a internet business? Desiree: Chris has been amazing, he has been beautifully direct, in his most exceptional way, and he is like, "Hey." (Chuckle.) (You're being your own best door." (Laugh.) "Stop creating doors. Stop putting up road blocks. There's, there's another way to do a thing." (Laugh.) "Maybe try this instead." And it's been awesome to have that. And to have him excited about the business too. Chris: Do you mind talking about how the business has done, over the last couple of months? Desiree: Yeah. When it first soft launched, I was on average doing one sale a day, and there'd be a couple days where somebody wouldn't buy a shirt, but then somebody would come along and buy two shirts, or three shirts. So on average, I'd say, in the last two weeks, sales have dropped off, but, you know, that's kind of par for the course in my head, of course this is gonna happen, but it doesn't mean I'm still not posting various social medias like "Hey, there's a new shirt," and then, I think in the near future, we're planning on doing some more marketing stuff. So I'm, I'm not worried, and, and I, and I know that will be just fine. And I will get to get off social security disability. And never deal with them again. It will be awesome. Liz: Describe your process for coming up with your designs. Desiree: Yeah. So, it will be, I'm having a conversation with somebody, and an idea will just strike me, and I have to go write it down in my idea sheet, somebody will come to me, with a design, and be like, "I need a shirt that says." So, for instance, my friend Tyanne said, "I need a shirt that says, 'I am done peopling." (Laugh.) So, there is a shirt on there that says, "I am done peopling." And Chris here, went and bought it. (Laugh.) He's like "Yes! This is the shirt I need." (Laugh.) I'm like, "Awesome. Cool." I was having a conversation with another lovely person, Brynn, and she was sharing to me her frustration about pronouns. So there now exists a series, a line of shirts, on there, that says, "If you will not use my pronouns, then clearly, your aim is to be hurtful." And it's in trans colors, and non-binary colors, and has the big major pronouns, she her, he him, they them, and if somebody doesn't find their representation, it's just a matter of, you know, E-mailing me, and I'm very, very happy to make the representation. And that's kind of the process. I'm either having a conversation with somebody, or, I'll be thinking about, you know, "Hey, I wish I could express this to somebody," and there it goes. Like the shirt I was talking about earlier about, you know, people struggling to even just greet us. Just to say "hello." You know, like how more obvious can it get? And, I must say, I also put pop culture, geeky things, and, and book stuff. So, the one that I just made in terms of like geeky, is there's an emotional support dragon shirt up there at the moment. It's currently available in purple, but I intend to make it in a few other colors as well. Chris: And you've found a, kind of an interesting niche, haven't you? In, uh, doing some customizations for people, right? Desiree: Yeah. You know, so if somebody isn't seeing a particular style of shirt that they want, or they want something specific to them, I'm very, very happy to work with them to make, you know, whatever idea they have possible. And it's a matter of, you know, if you're fine with everybody having access to your shirt, then, you know, it's a free thing and we just go back and forth, but if you really want that shirt to yourself, then yes, you're gonna get charged extra. Or if there's another piece of clothing that I have access to that you want to design, yup. More than happy. Like, let's make it happen. So you can express your true inner feelings. Let people know how you really feel. MOe: Is there a special design that is especially meaningful to you? Desiree: Oh. I'm really fond of "emotional support dragon," (Laugh.) At the moment. There is a "space cowboy canceled show" shirt on there. That show just, oh. I cannot, I cannot speak enough of the show. Will, Will I actually name it? No, 'cause I don't want to get in trouble, (Chuckle.) For copyright stuff, but I did my best to try to make it, not, you know? That, that particular show just meant so, so much to me, and I, I'm really angry that a certain TV station canceled it early, 'cause they just didn't understand it. Liz: Is there anything that you would like us to know about Flaunt Your Ability that we have not asked about? Desiree: Yeah, so Flaunt Your Ability will just be one venue of an overall umbrella company that's called Desiree's ATALYE, atilye's the French word for "workshop," um, so, I'm also currently filming all the various different sewing and knitting things that I do and if any other crafting type stuff, so that gets put out on TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram. Uh, under "The Nearly Blind Knitter and Stitcher." That's like one, and then another umbrella of this will be, I want to collect blind crafters. Because I hear a lot of them, you know, they, they make amazing things, they make really good quality things, but they want to sell them, but they don't have, or want to get involved in the business end of things. So, if I can collect other blind crafters, and sell, help them market, sell their stuff, you know, they don't always have the wherewithal to do the businessy end of things, but I would love to put their stuff out there so they too could be making money. They too could be getting an audience. They could, too could get people asking for custom work. And I know I'll come up with more stuff than that, but that, that's just at the moment, (laugh.) under the umbrella of Desiree's ATALYE. 'cause "workshop" to me means that it's a place to gather people to go be creative. To go create things. To, you know, come together, brainstorm, it's a working place of creativity for folks to gather. Chris: Wow. That, this is, really great. And thank you for being willing to come on and tell your, all the, the, sad and happy sides of ... (Desiree chuckles.) Chris: of this success story in the making here. Now I hope that people listening will go and check out Flaunt Your Ability, and support it if you're willing and able. So that they can do that, tell everybody where they can find it. Desiree: It is literally flauntyourability.com is where that is located, and if you want to find me on social media, then search for "The Nearly Blind Knitter and Stitcher." Chris: All right. And we'll put all of that in the show notes. Desiree, thank you for being here. So proud of you. That's all the time we have for this week's edition of the Penny Forward podcast. Before we do the closing credits, I'd like to thank our partners and sponsors, APH Connect Center, World Services for the Blind, Thrivent, and Wells Fargo. And if you would like to sponsor Penny Forward, and the Penny Forward podcast, go to pennyforward.com/sponsorships and there is a package that is the right size for you, I'm confident, right there. The Penny Forward podcast is produced by Chris Peterson and Liz Bottner, with help from MOe Carpenter, audio editing and post production is provided by Brynn Lee at superblink.org and transcription is provided by Anne Verduin. The music is composed and performed by Andre Louis. All of those people, by the way, are blind. Penny Forward is a nonprofit organization founded and led by blind people, and together, we help each other navigate the complicated landscape of personal finance through education, mentoring, and mutual support. We offer this podcast, a blog, self-paced online financial education courses, weekly and monthly financial education workshops, and a monthly member meet-up, as well as a weekly newsletter, and so much more. Visit our web site, www.pennyforward.com and join us today. Now, for all of us in the Penny Forward community, I'm Chris Peterson, ... Liz: I'm Liz Bottner, ... MOe: I'm MOe Carpenter, ... Chris: Thanks for listening, and have a great week.